Detransition, Baby - Torrey Peters

I always follow the Women’s Prize for fiction very closely, keeping an eye on all the longlisted and shortlisted books. So I saw all the praise for Detransition, Baby last year, but it has shamefully taken me this long to read the prize’s first longlisted book written by a trans novelist.

SYNOPSIS: Detransition, Baby is about three women whose lives collide after an unexpected pregnancy forces them to confront their deepest desires around gender, motherhood, and sex. Reese almost had it all: a loving relationship with Amy, an apartment in New York City, a job she didn't hate. She had scraped together what previous generations of trans women could only dream of: a life of mundane, bourgeois comforts. The only thing missing was a child. But then her girlfriend, Amy, detransitioned and became Ames, and everything fell apart. Now Reese is caught in a self-destructive pattern: avoiding her loneliness by sleeping with married men.

Ames isn't happy either. He thought detransitioning to live as a man would make life easier, but that decision cost him his relationship with Reese—and losing her meant losing his only family. Even though their romance is over, he longs to find a way back to her. When Ames's boss and lover, Katrina, reveals that she's pregnant with his baby—and that she's not sure whether she wants to keep it—Ames wonders if this is the chance he's been waiting for. Could the three of them form some kind of unconventional family—and raise the baby together?

REVIEW: The story is told from both Ames and Reece’s perspectives which allows us, as readers, to learn more about the two characters individually, as well as their past relationship and their thoughts regarding their current predicament. Although I enjoyed having the story from both perspectives, I found myself empathising more with Ames’ story than Reece’s and even now I’m questioning why that was? Perhaps it was because with Ames’ story, I felt real pain about how he had/how he was feeling whereas with Reece’s narrative, it made me feel like I shouldn't feel sorry for her. I wonder if this, or some part of this reading experience, was the author Torrey Peters’ plan - to give the reader complicated protagonists who they may or may not like.

I think what stood out to me most during this story was the theme of ‘motherhood’. The book describes Reece, Ames and Katrina as ‘three failed mom-wannabees' and throughout the book makes reference to a lot of different opinions about the decision to have children. For some, like Katrina, they are never given the luxury of the decision. Katrina didn’t decide to get pregnant the first time and she didn’t make the decision to have a miscarriage and she certainly did not decide to pregnant again with Ames. For others, like Ames, they make the decision to lose out on possibly having a biological child the moment they decide to start taking hormone replacements. And perhaps for others, like Reece, they decide a long time ago that the only thing that would give them true happiness is to have a child, yet society has decided against this decision for them because they are trans and therefore, less likely to be accepted for adoption. Peters’ does a wonderful job of picking apart society’s idea of motherhood and the pressure it puts on people (women especially) to want children, as equally as the pressure it puts on transsexuals to not want/have children. ‘Suppress not express’ certainly comes to mind.

Personally, I enjoyed the story even though I wouldn’t say it’s an exciting, action-packed novel but then again, it doesn’t need to be. For me, I felt like the book was such an incredible learning experience. I’m not part of the trans community but that doesn’t mean I don’t care. I suppose in a way, I care more because I want to educate myself on the struggles of someone I can’t relate to so I can empathise and learn more. There is a lot of language used in this novel that I have never come across before because I am not part of the LGBTQ+ community but I liked how Peters didn’t give us a little glossary at the back to help. Instead she gives no explanation and lets us learn about these terms for ourselves.

The book really does unpick these ideas of motherhood, gender and sex, and discusses why it’s OK to want exactly want you want in life, and to change your mind sometimes too! It’s your life and you decide how you want to live it! Without spoiling anything, I also loved the ambiguous ending as I thought it complemented the book and the reading experience superbly!

READ THIS IF:

👶 You’re looking for a compelling read about motherhood

👶 You’re interested in reading LGBT+ fiction

👶 You like books that flick between the present and the past